Which Comes First: The Kids or the Pets?

Fido may just have to wait to become part of the family.

I’ve wanted a dog for a long time. Ever since my faithful and loveable terrier passed away a few years back, it’s been on my mind. Now, since I’m well on my way to becoming a homeowner, I finally have a chance to become a pet owner again. So why am I so hesitant to pull the trigger and get one?

Well, the long and short of it is that my wife and I want kids in the next year or two, and a successful balance in the household is very important to me. The dilemma is whether I should get a pet now, or wait until we have children to do so. I’ve heard two different sides of the argument between getting pets before or after kids, and it seems to be an even debate. Life with pets before babies doesn’t have to be all that bad, especially for certain types of pets and breeds. Cats tend to take care of themselves for the most part, while some dogs are great with children and can protect them as their own. Prospective parents apparently get a sneak peek into parenthood with pets, as they need constant attention, love, and care. Some even claim that having pets before kids can help with their kids’ allergies. These kids likely won’t grow up with a fear of pets, either.

On the other hand, there are a lot of reasons to wait until after the kids are born to get a pet. The most glaring one is described in the following scene: I can imagine myself coming home one day after work and opening the door to complete chaos. One of my children is in the high chair flinging most of his or her food around the room while spitting up the rest. My other child is chasing the cat around the house like a madman. My dog, starved for attention, is busy ripping up the throw pillows we just purchased a week ago to replace the old ones it destroyed. And my poor wife is having a nervous breakdown, overwhelmed by the disaster area that is our home. Now, of course being petless at this stage won’t change the children’s behavior, but there would obviously be much less responsibility on our shoulders. Plus, if we wait until the kids are older, they can even help out with pet duty (and the associated pet doody).

Most advice states that there is no definitive choice on the matter. It’s tough because to make a decision you have to factor in breed of pet, time requirements, cost, and living situation, just to name a few. And every situation is different. I’m leaning towards waiting until after kids, especially since I live an active lifestyle and don’t want to gyp anyone or any pet of my time or attention. But what do you think? Do you have any advice or experience to share about pets and kids?